


Blobs and Ninjas

by Lyall_Lupa



Category: Overwatch (Video Game)
Genre: Hana is an honorary Shimada, Inspired by Honored Spirits, M/M, Noodle Dragons, Shimada Brothers being non-impressed, silly fic, sort of crack fic
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-12-25
Updated: 2018-12-25
Packaged: 2019-09-27 10:32:20
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 898
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17160371
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Lyall_Lupa/pseuds/Lyall_Lupa
Summary: The Watchpoint is subjected to old videos by the noodles and Hana.





	Blobs and Ninjas

**Author's Note:**

  * For [Dracoduceus](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Dracoduceus/gifts).



> These two videos inspired me to write a silly Christmas fic for DC (because they are cool and a really good friend <3 <3 <3). Merry Christmas!!
> 
> Mr. Blobby  
> <https://youtu.be/h37KQu64RY4>
> 
> Segata Sanshiro  
> <https://youtu.be/gc3AK8k90xw>

“Why are we being summoned? Has anything bad happened”?” asked a very sleepy Hana to Lucio, as she drank the coffee he had handed to her.  
“I have no idea, but I think it has something to do with the dragons”  
“The dragons? What trouble have they gotten into now? I heard them mumbling about something, but I couldn’t understand them.”  
“I don’t know. Genji or Hanzo should be able to help. Or McCree”  
“They don’t know either. They just know that the dragons are very excited and curious about something, but they have not been able to figure out what it is, as the noodles are speaking way too fast for human ears.”  
“Well, I guess we will see soon” replied Lucio with a small shrug.

When they get to the rec room, they are welcomed by the rest of the Watchpoint, as well as three excitable noodles.The Shimadas and McCree all looked extremely tired, and in need of a stiff drink. An exhausted Hanzo spoke:

“As you all know, Ramen uses the internet quite well, and is quite adept at finding obscure things. They have found a music video from the 20th century, and they want to show it to us. Apparently is quite confusing, and they cannot make sense of it”  
“It makes no sense, Shimada Hanzo” said Udon. “Udon-who-is not a noodle could not find the logic in it”  
“I know, Udon. That is why we summoned everybody here” replied Hanzo. “Are you ready to show us the video?”  
“YES!” shouted the three dragons at the same time, making Hanzo wince in pain.  
“Maybe you can be a bit less loud, dears” said McCree, also seemingly in pain. “Anyway, show us the video”.

Ramen moved to the TV, and fiddled with the controls, until they found what they were looking for. The video started with a bunch of dancers doing slow, robotic movements, as some mumbling could be heard in the back.

“What is this?” asked Hana curiously, as a countdown could be heard and the camera focused on…

“Mr. Blobby!” screeched Tracer. “He is a classic!”  
“Mister What Now?” said McCree.  
“Blobby! He is a children TV mascot!”  
“THAT is for children? asked McCree with an incredulous look, as he watched the terrifying pink and yellow blob dancing on the screen. “How don’t they get nightmares? Look at those eyes!”  
“Mr.Blobby is a national treasure! It was the number 1 Christmas video in 1993. My nana told me everything about it!”  
“I think it qualifies as child torture”  
“MCCREE! STOP BEING SO BORING!” boomed Reinhard, who dancing along to the video, trying to imitate the choreography that Tracer seemed to know by heart . The rest of the team was different levels of scared, amused or disgusted, with the big exception the Shimada brothers, both looking very not-impressed about the whole affair.

“What’s wrong, darlin’s?” asked McCree.  
“Nothing is wrong. We are just surprised that you are scared at that. It’s more ridiculous that scary. I understand why the dragons find it confusing, though. It makes no sense.” replied Hanzo.  
“I actually think it’s quite cute”, added Genji.  
“I wouldn’t go as far as calling him cute, but he is certainly less terrifying, and weird that most of of our children mascots” replied Hanzo.  
“I agree, brother. And it cannot compare to Segata Sanshiro!”

Hanzo rolled his eyes bemusedly, as all people present, except for Hana, looked extremely confused. The dragons smiled, showing lots of teeth, as they flew around the room excitedly.

“Ohhhh! I know this one!!” said Hana, who quickly, fiddled with the TV, until she found what she wanted. “I now introduce you to the saga of Segata Sanshiro! Nobody moves until it’s over! We have dragons and we know how to use them!”. Genji laughed at her words, and she could have swore that Hanzo looked at her proudly.

During the following ten minutes, Hana and Genji singing along to the them was all that could be heard; Hanzo wasn’t joining in the singing, but he was having a really hard time keeping a hard face, a smile escaping from time to time. When the last ad, depicting Segata Sanshiro’s heroic sacrifice, was played, Reinhardt started sobbing loudly:

“That was magnificent! Such a noble sacrifice!”  
“T’was for the sake of a company, big guy” said McCree.  
“Still a noble sacrifice! Like a knight of old times!!”  
Genji giggled, and told Jesse: “You better not badmouth Segata Sanshiro in front of Hanzo, Jesse, or you will end up sleeping on the sofa”  
“Hey, I quite liked him. He was more bad-ass and fun that the pink blob. Anyway, how do you guys know about this. Isn’t it quite old?” inquired McCree.  
“One of our grand aunts showed it to Genji; she had a soft spot for him, and knew how much he liked video games. Genji then he showed it to me, and I loved them. The ads were so fun, and so traditional in certain aspects. As a child, I was quite fond of what he represented; for years, I dreamed of sacrificing myself for the sake of the clan, just like Segata Sanshiro had done for the company”  
“Jesus Christ, Hanzo. Nothing normal ever with you, sweetheart?”  
“Never. And that’s how you like it  
“Truer words were never said”, replied Jesse, shutting him down with a kiss.

**Author's Note:**

> As usual, apologies for my English. I am not a native speaker.


End file.
